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The Adventures of Joe: Space Ranger Action Hero 2.5

“What the heck was that!” Joe screamed as the lights seemed to come back on.

You told me to be quiet, so I was.

“I didn’t tell you to turn off the whole story! Even if it is an art piece!”

Well, you must realize Joe that if I don’t say anything, nothing happens.

“Alright, alright. I apologize. Just don’t do that again.”

Very well.

“But I would appreciate it if you would stop bugging me while I’m trying to have an adventure!”

You never seem to stop bugging me when I’m narrating. Why should I listen to you?

Joe sighed to himself. “Point taken.”

Besides, with this particular story, I have artistic license.

“Whatever,” said Joe as he went back to digging through the pile of comic books. “Steve! I said come out of there! As your action hero boss, I command you!”

Suddenly, there was a whimper from deep within the pile of comic books. “Aww, do I have to?” whined Steve.

“Yes, you do! I’m going to make something out of this even if it kills us!”

“Oh, alright,” came another whimper from the pile of comic books.

Slowly, one hand made its way free from the comic books. Then another hand appeared. Grabbing hold of the sides of the pile, Steve slowly clawed his way out as if he was rising from the dead.

“There you are!” Joe shouted with glee.

“Okay, now what?” mumbled Steve.

“We’re off to the NBNLFM in search of adventure!”

Steve sighed sarcastically, “Well, there’s a plot twist that I just wasn’t expecting.”

“Oh come on!” said Joe as he grabbed Steve’s arm, “It’ll be fun!”

With that, Joe dragged Steve with him and headed out the door.


(Camera stays in front of Joe and Steve as they barrel out the ramshackle door and onto the surface of the barren moon. They immediately head towards the only other noticeable thing on the entire surface of crater-ville: the NBNLFM. Cue another Joe/Narrator argument.)


For those of you who were fortunate enough to miss the first several installments of the continuing adventures of Joe: Space Ranger Action Hero, the NBNLFM is the New Blue Neon Light Fate Machine. It is a big flashy looking flying space toy that Joe uses to go wherever adventure lies. Personally, I just think it is nothing but a cheap plot device.

“Hey!” interrupted Joe mid Steve-dragging, “What was that about people being fortunate to have missed the first installments? Missing any of my adventures is a tragedy man!”

Believe what you want, but I think ‘insufferable’ is the only way to describe anything you’re involved with.

Joe sighed, “You know, you do your best to make me look bad.”

Thank you. By the way, I dare you to try and deny that the NBNLFM is nothing more than a cheap plot device.

“I don’t deny it, but it is pretty cool huh?”

Whatever. Anyway, Joe and Steve continued to make their way towards the mighty NBNLFM. Once there, Joe slaped the flashy pile of metal on the side, and a doorway promptly folds open in response.

“After you Steve!” Joe announced triumphantly.

“Yay,” was all Steve could manage before he slowly climbed in. Joe popped in right afterwards and closed the hatch.


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